Do you really get married with the familia too??

Hi everyone! I hope you had a fantastic Halloween and are having a blast eating all the candy. (come on, we know you eat the candy too! LOL)

(I just thought the below was a little rebellious and funny! LOL I don't think it's true in EVERY case.)

This entire week I have been thinking of this topic. "Marriage and the extended Familia". Do we really get married with the entire clan? Can we escape the fact that we have crazy in-laws? Or they're so nice you just want to spend all your time with them (this is rare, lets be honest!)

Yes, it is true. Unfortunately for some, myself included... You are married to the family as well. I have been married twice and it's not something that I am ashamed of. I am glad to share my experiences with everyone. My first marriage was very hard, because culturally we did not see eye to eye and I had no support from the person I was married to. My second marriage, I had an absolutely amazing father-in-law and amazing sisters and brother in-law. During my divorce, I think it hurt me more to know that I would have to stay away from them then the actual divorce. After having had both experiences and analyzing the situations, I must say that marriage and the "Familia" are not easy to juggle. Yes, you have to be friendly, calm and polite, but I am one that believes that you shouldn't suffer silently. The more you keep inside, the more hurt you will feel and things will only get worse. Obviously, having a supportive spouse is a major + in all this.

This may sound corny, but getting a therapist involved in order to iron out the issues between you and your partner is a good idea. Many times, its a good idea to get the family involved too. This kind of experience will allow you and your loved ones to be able to share in a neutral environment so that everyone has a chance to speak their mind.

Marriage is not an easy road and you need all the support, patience and Godly help you can get. Even in the best of partnerships there will be bumps in the road, but its part of life and if we take it as a growing experience the better off we are. However, DO NOT allow yourself to be spoken down to, abused in any way. If that is happening, GET OUT! I always say that God allows the storms so that we can recognize the choices we've made, to learn from them and to grow. Without a little storm we become accommodated in our own crazy situations and don't allow change to do it's thing.

I hope this helped! Please feel free to share your views.

xx
D